thoughts thoughts thoughts

first off, is anyone else so SICK AND TIRED of this background??? but we don't have a scanner here, so i can't make a new one. because i don't know how to create with the intranet and the computer and other newfangled technology. so we will all just have to deal.

secondly, the cambodian acrobats did NOT disappoint. as our first date in six months, it would have been supreme no matter what, but it was definitely an intriguing and affecting and rather mind-blowing experience on its own. the highlight for me was when the girl playing the main character in the story, who had just been tortured by Death--and let me tell you, contortionists can pull of some impressive torture--she pulled herself into a pretzel and shot a bow and arrow with her feeeet over her heeeaaad and exploded this big heartballoon. it was intense. i would never in a million years have thought to combine circus tricks and the khmer rouge, but i thought it was very effective. unfortunately, we have no pictures to share. but it was incredible.

thirdly, and less excitingly, our meeting with the orphanage folks did not go so well, to put it mildly. actually, the meeting itself went swimmingly; we were thrice declared direct answers to prayers and given copious contacts in the orphanage and social work worlds.

but then. apparently someone informed the president of this network that we are mormon. and i received a little email cordially inviting us never to contact any of their directors or programs again. to be honest, i was a little relieved, because i had misunderstood the kind of work they were doing in the first place, and i'd felt uncomfortable signing up to support an effort i don't particularly like [i should just say it now: i don't think it's appropriate to separate a child from a family that loves him/her in the name of Opportunity. i would much rather support that family and keep it intact. kids who are not legitimate orphans without any family support should not be in institutions. research backs me up on this one. send me a holler if you'd like to learn more, eh?]. so now we don't have to go through that awkwardness.

i will be honest. i am hurt and initially a little hotheaded when christians tell me i don't believe in Jesus and that, in essence, i am a danger to children. it doesn't happen often, but it does happen. i only share this story for two reasons: 1) we had a request for a recap of our meeting in the comments on the last post, and 2) this new development does put a damper on our current ambitions, seeing as said network spreads throughout thailand. being unofficially blacklisted will be somewhat problematic, but it's not the end of the world.

i don't share this to bash on christians (here i'm referring to people who follow Christ and feel that we don't). in fact, i really admire their unabashed love for the gospel and willingness to share it; i sometimes wish i could be so bold. i really believe these people are goodhearted. it's not my nor their fault that they've been taught that we're deceived renegades. i'm just sad that this enmity continues to exist. and i'm sad that our beliefs are going to make it harder for us to find ways to be legitimately helpful to people in this country.

but we'll figure it out.

oh, in other news, i've forgotten to mention that we will be in the states from march 29 to may 5. this is exciting, no? probably more exciting for certain persons is our reason for the visit, and that is nick's older brother thomas's wedding to ms. courtney. they've been "together" longer than nick and i have, so we're pretty stoked to see these two take the plunge. finally.

but if you reside in california, texas, arkansas, or utah, we'd love to see your pretty faces while we're there!

now, if you don't mind, i'm off to paint. a picture. no walls today, for i am taking a mental health day and creating something with color. or maybe music. cuz i shore do need it.